The last year has been tough on all of us. In my previous blog, I already talked about how I felt I was blossoming in the corona times. It might sound weird if you haven’t read it yet, so make sure you give it a read if you are looking a bit confused.
But that’s not what I’d like to talk about today. Now I’d like to share my story about how hard it was to stay centered in the past couple of months. Well, mostly from March until May 2020 and then from November 2020 on again.
Dealing With Everyone’s Opinion
So, now that we are going through quite some things, it looks like everyone is going more and more extreme in their opinion.
I’ve had numerous friends whine and complain. And without any judgment in it, I understand why. It is difficult and it is not the nicest time to live in at this moment.
However, during my decade and a half of walking the spiritual path, I felt to stay in the middle. And damn, what hard it was.
Especially in the beginning, when everything was new. I felt a deep understanding for nurses and doctors, making sure that they don’t get too overwhelmed in doing their work.
I also felt concerned for others and myself to catch the virus. It wasn’t too hard to follow most of the rules and to make sure there wasn’t any immediate risk.
This made it very hard to believe the other side, or even to listen to them. All of the theories in this world were just getting too crazy and I just didn’t believe them.
I still don’t believe in them, just to be clear, but that’s for in a bit.
As an introvert, it was really hard to find my place in all of this. And what I’ve actually learned during this last year, is to find my voice and to speak up.
Yeah, it’s not always that easy, especially towards people that have a strong opinion. (And are a little bit hard-headed)
I can say it was truly frustrated at times to talk to people. My group of friends got slowly smaller, making sure that only the essential people stuck around. Which was a bit of a nicer side effect.
And it’s wintertime now anyway, so it might be good anyway to go inwards rather than always talking to people.
Finding The Balance
So, as I was letting go of a couple of people, I was really trying to be mindful of it as well. I didn’t just want to drop them and never talk to them again.
I did try having a conversation, but it just went down the same direction.
Every time I tried to keep the conversation light and positive, but it just wasn’t doing anything.
And the thing happened that I experienced in my younger life: I didn’t feel heard.
As I’m aware that this is also a part of me, I knew that I had to work on this as well, for myself.
For me, I decided that it was enough of people around me that wanted to rant about their beliefs and forget about mine.
And this is where the biggest struggle comes for me:
How to find the balance between respecting people and their opinion and not giving up on your beliefs.
As a spiritual person, I’ve been told and I felt it, that we are all human with our own processes to let unfold and to learn.
So who am I to tell someone that it is not right?
The answer is: I don’t know just yet. I probably have to meditate upon this part a little bit more.
What I feel though, is that it’s alright to have my opinion. It’s alright for the other to have an opinion. But it’s not that necessary to interact with those people just yet.
For me, this is the best possible option at this moment. As I’m not yet at the place where I’d like to be: Full acceptance of the other persons’ beliefs.
Especially when it comes down to beliefs like racism and discrimination.
We all know them.
And I also know that it doesn’t come out of the blue. There are people that are frightened of people of a different color. It might be because they were raised that way, or because they just didn’t have many people with a different tone around them.
It all contributes to wherever your respects lie.
Very often it’s not rational, but who am I to judge them?
Until I’ve reached that point I think it might be best to keep them at a distance. Or maybe not. We’ll see how the universe unfolds.
Dealing With Spiritual Extremism
But to bring us back to the topic. Let’s talk about what’s been really disappointing me in the past year.
Spiritual extremism, I wanna call it, even though I know it has a lot of judgment in its name.
I don’t have another way to say it at this moment. But it’s how I feel it for now. Maybe I change the title later.
So many people I know have started to spread theories about what’s going on in the world.
I was aware of many of these already a long time before, but I never was really too fond of them. A bit like: Well, let them just be and we’ll see what’s true, and what isn’t.
Not being skeptical, just letting it be for what it is.
Unfortunately, it has gone a bit of the rails right now.
It’s not that I’m against all of the conspiracies. I know the world isn’t as rainbowy as we hope it would be.
Fake Vs. Real Media
However, some things were so farfetched that I didn’t know where on earth they got it from.
One thing I felt for myself. I want to move from a place of love, and as long as I don’t know what’s going on, I just try to protect the people I love.
So, wearing a mask? Didn’t bother me at all… I don’t know why some people are making such a fuzz out of it. I can perfectly breathe, I can perfectly make myself clear. It’s how it is.
At some point, I did start to get really worried though. People were shouting so many things, that I just couldn’t believe that they were still calling themselves spiritual.
But yet again, I had to be aware that this wasn’t my process. They have their opinion and their belief. And I just have to make sure that this doesn’t get me in my process.
What I just felt is that for me, being centered, meant that I would have to leave all kinds of media for what it is. Everything is colored and everyone sees everything from his own perspective.
This makes it not easy to see what the real truth is. And if that even exists!
For me, all of these things are just created from the mind. Anxiety coming from the mainstream media, and anger coming from the other media.
Our minds want to create something to deal with this crisis. And very often it’s further away from the truth than it actually is.
And that’s why I was so disappointed with many spiritual people. But again, this is also my process.
And in a way, I found how to cope with it. As they are going through their process, I just make sure that I stay on mine.